Comments on: Jackie In The Year of the Comet http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/jackie-in-the-night/ We serve only the finest fresh-roasted electrons. Tue, 22 Dec 2009 08:53:11 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Paul http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/jackie-in-the-night/#comment-3156 Paul Thu, 13 Mar 2008 02:37:53 +0000 http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/?p=741#comment-3156 Usha, you are a genius! That is a brilliant insight! Thank you so much for that! Usha, you are a genius! That is a brilliant insight! Thank you so much for that!

]]> By: usha http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/jackie-in-the-night/#comment-3153 usha Thu, 13 Mar 2008 01:46:58 +0000 http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/?p=741#comment-3153 It seems to me that the entire peer interaction in the early growing up years is about acquiring masks to make people like you. You slowly stop being the person you are and become a person you want others to be - in order to belong to the gang, to be liked by your peers, to be liked by boys etc. The process reverses once your each adulthood. Adulthood is not about age but it is about acceptance and being comfortable with who you are. So I guess Jackie was initiated into this process of adulthood on that beautiful night. Your description of the night was very evocative - it was palpable while reading. It seems to me that the entire peer interaction in the early growing up years is about acquiring masks to make people like you. You slowly stop being the person you are and become a person you want others to be – in order to belong to the gang, to be liked by your peers, to be liked by boys etc. The process reverses once your each adulthood. Adulthood is not about age but it is about acceptance and being comfortable with who you are.
So I guess Jackie was initiated into this process of adulthood on that beautiful night.
Your description of the night was very evocative – it was palpable while reading.

]]> By: Paul http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/jackie-in-the-night/#comment-3134 Paul Wed, 12 Mar 2008 10:50:46 +0000 http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/?p=741#comment-3134 Very good point, Lirone! And very well said! Very good point, Lirone! And very well said!

]]> By: lirone http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/jackie-in-the-night/#comment-3133 lirone Tue, 11 Mar 2008 20:19:15 +0000 http://cafephilos.wordpress.com/?p=741#comment-3133 Sounds like it was a very lovely evening! Comets and hot springs are a lovely combination... Some really interesting thoughts on masks and being genuine- which is coincidentally something I've been also thinking and writing about recently. I think the point you make in the last-but-one paragraph is spot on and beautifully put. But there's an important caveat - I think if you love someone you also accept their masks, in the same way you accept the fears that make them wear the masks. You may be eager to see them as they really are, and want to help them tackle the fears and remove the masks so that the person they are underneath can shine more brightly - but this takes time and trust. Real love won't try to hurry the process, or reject someone just because their fears make them mask their own inner light at times. Sounds like it was a very lovely evening! Comets and hot springs are a lovely combination…

Some really interesting thoughts on masks and being genuine- which is coincidentally something I’ve been also thinking and writing about recently.

I think the point you make in the last-but-one paragraph is spot on and beautifully put.

But there’s an important caveat – I think if you love someone you also accept their masks, in the same way you accept the fears that make them wear the masks.

You may be eager to see them as they really are, and want to help them tackle the fears and remove the masks so that the person they are underneath can shine more brightly – but this takes time and trust.

Real love won’t try to hurry the process, or reject someone just because their fears make them mask their own inner light at times.

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